Support Mum's Little Hero

I was called by my mum to read over tis pages of newspaper tis aftnoon.
I thought wat she's goin to show me tis time again coz usually she wil
jus like to cal me for fun whenever she wants to.
But comes to my suprise when i let myself to read tis articles once through,
a story tat had really touch my heart of how a mother that had creates a website
for her premature 28-week-old baby who was diagnosed with bronchopulmonary dysplasia(BPD)
& was jus 7months old when he died.Aft his little baby-Vincent died,
her mum had a strong desire to keep her memories of him alive.
Where u can all get it frm 30 Sept (Thursday) on page 17...
or u can jus pay a visit to www.geocities.com/malaysianmomshare
that was hvin a website in honour of their children's memories is sumthg
very precious.So tat more parents can open bout their grief& help others
to start toking bout their feelings to create an awareness among Malaysians,
thus helping everyone to better cope with loss and grief.For tis lady Chan,
aft toking and acknowledging her own feelings she has been able to pick up
the pieces and start living her life again...

AnOiting 'n' FiRe oF GoD

Today hv been a gd day for me,as usual it's a Sunday but d special thg bout today is i got to experience God once again...Our Rev Pastor Dexter & Lily Low(who's d founda of LRC) came down to Mlc...for d information of those who duno how Latter Rain was started,i kindly say a little bout us L.R.C. LRC was started in d year of 1975 in Ujong Pasir Mlc...Slowly aft a hard effort that hv been put in,growing step by step til wher we r today L.R.C we hv our branch in every state on Malaysia,in Gold Coast,Australia...
Today's sunday worship started as usual at 10.00 but it end up 1hour 30 minutes later that is 1.30 pm....it have been my heart desire to get to experience God once again,to cry & thirst for him like ever b4.No other God n no other place cld make me feel tis way,i use to hv a deep memory for tis church,n i realise i love LRC alot,its wher i feel im really sets free,it's wher i feel im secure,it's wher i cry,n i jus feel d presence of God so deeply in tis temple of God.
Ther r ppl who asked me if one day im married to a christian who r not frm tis church,wil i follow him to his church or wil i stay?Honestly i could answer...my hearts say no bcoz Im so use to everythg in tis church,to clean d church every sat n so on...Habit is oways hard to change...If i hv a choice to choose i wont choose to leav d church at all!

I hv learn tis verse frm d church tis morning
* LoVE involve sacrifice
* LoVe involve giving

In all kinds of circumstances,many ppl fear to let go.But God wan us to GO,get out of the mentality tat hv no enuf,afraid,fearful to love,to give our times,energy,financial n so on...We have jus need to Go n get the resources to build the temple of Christ!Obedience n sacrifice is jus so important for me n every single Christian in order to build the temple of Him!

SuMmary Of Thgs Tat Hpn

19 Sept 2004 - Sunday
Yea it's sunday today,gotta rush for church again.Aft a long nite hanging out with Jas,Jac,Ee ping,Sherene,Keith is really use lotsa of my strength.Jac n Sherene staying in my house tonite!!Jas came n pick us up tonite and we hang out together again,haha reb u noe lar sat is for wat rite?hmm bet u know wat i mean.By the way stil feel abit weird as u wasnt around.Jac n jas bully me alot ler....:( ... well jus a picture for ya to knoe wats goin on with us in mlc.

-Went to church today,as usual playing keyboard
-Aft church went out v mum n sis to shop for new cloths,haha!
-Chin Pi n Jac ask to play pool in d aftnoon but didnt go
-Went my couz wedding lunch at 2pm,ate alot,putting weight now n fat like piggy i think
-Got a funny sms that wil tel ya ( Reb ) more details thru email k
-Ate another packet of Nasi Lemak bought by mum
-Too full til im not able to move haha
-Sleep

Well,today went to sch as normal but the study timetable for today is much more relaxing bcoz of d absenties of d teacher n students...stay back in sch chatting n doin sum omework with jas n jac...Came home went to tuition,Chin Pi came n we tok til bout 8.30pm.have our supper with Mandy n got back hm.

Reb :
Hey looks like ya really enjoyin lot over ther.wel i jus not able to post comment into ur blog,dono y?>To my suprise ther r quite number of students frm Asean or Malaysia that went ther to study....We did misses u alot but blieve that time pas fast n i can get to c ya soon!Tat day when i sms u is jus a sudden type of feeling but aft sms with Kiat,im much more better!I so kesian here without u kena bully alot by those 2fellows,u know lar who haha!Wanted to ask how much different between ur time n our time here?Could u ask Man to sent our pic to my email add-elizabeth_crlay@yahoo.com can?Dad mayb coming down to mlc end of sept for our project in Tmn Bachang Utama,i bom him alot recently.He's bad,went to tel Silas n Rachel bout wat hpn to us on 15 Sept in the air port.Haiya make me feel so shy ler!

Dun have to worry bout the cloth,Mum say is ok it's jus a simple stuf doesnt matter!Jus take gd care of it we r happy if not u gonna spent lotsa money for it again ad!Pls give me ur add k,i wanna post sum stuf to u up ther.Wher's my letter chicken?

We r goin to watch circus on Thursday nite together all 8person,promise ya wil watch with u when u r back,k!Take care,mis ya!

*Love Phoebe*

BeLoVed ReBecca

Specially dedicated to my beloved Rebecca~

Dear Rebecca :
Jus wanna say that i really miz u very much over here...Is really much....
From the bottom of my heart,i really dun willing to see u goin frm here alone.
I know it wil b a different way round if 4 of us can go together it wil definitely wil b a fully joy for us.
Looking at u one of the smallest size girl pushing your luggage go into the entry ,
The feeling of unwilling is so strong,
Worried that u cant used to the weather,
Worried u wil alone ther hv no one besides u whn u need sumone,
Worried that someone wil bully u,
Is jus a word " Bu She De " can describe.
Words jus cant express my feeling now,
Words would can jus never get to tel u that PHOEBE,JASMINDER N JACQUELINE MISSES U ALOT OVER HERE.
We jus cant wait to see u again,to hug u & share everythg together again.
U r jus VERY IMPORTANT for us, for the sistership and frenship that we have ,
Nothing could ever COMPARE...
We dun mind losing the thgs that we have lost eventhough if we have to lose it all, lose it through,
Infact we dun think we lost them Bcoz we Have You around be with us
And i know u feel the same for US.
We promise we wil put all our effort to study the hardest way we could for you,
We wont disspoint the hope n faith u put in us bcoz I DUN WANT TO DISSPOINT U ,
Pls take a very good care of yourself dear.
WE LOVE YOU !

MeMoRaBLe DaY

14 September 2004
Today was the last night before Rebecca goin to leav mlc to UK.So we have plan up to go and stay overnite in Century tonite.Without delay our the plams that we have
-check in in Century at 4.30pm
-pack our thgs n we head ther straight we ready
-Have a great time spending together,swimming together with 4 n Shawn
-Went mp to buy our drinks
-Watch movie together with Keith n Gary
-Play pool aft that n head back to hotel...

Toking the last nite together ,drinking,singing,hearing our songs together,laughing together and tok our deeply secrets bout thgs in our life and it gonna takes me another 2 years to see her if possible she could make it back to mlc on December 2005 as wat she promised us.

15 September 2004
Time pass fast and it left less than a day that we could spent the rest of the time with Rebecca.
Today's activity
-Woke up at 9.30am to bring her for Dim Sum
-Went back to hotel kept our thgs
-Check up everythg
-Snaps some photo together as a memory
-Check out from Hotel
-Bring Rebecca to MEGLIO to cut her hairs
-Tok to Ben bout some other issue
-Went home
-Write a letter for Rebecca

And so i wil hv to wait til 7pm,Jas pick us up n hv our diner til bout 8pm,we start our journey to KLIA.Times is getting nearer n nearer.On the way to KLIA,all of us keep looking at the time as we seems we gonna mis her alot.Get to reach ther at 9.45pm as she wil have to go in by 10.30pm.

All of us walking damn fast to get the place to the department centre.Sum of her frenz have arrive ther.When we reach we couldnt get to c wher she is,getting more worry as we wanna spend the time together for if she didnt get to come back in nex years i wil have to wait for another 4 years.

At last, she found us and she hug 3 of us one by one.As wat Jas told medun let Rebecca hug us bcoz in the aftnoon before Jas went home,Rebecca give her a hug as Jas donot know whether wil she get to send Rebecca to the airport.At las we found that Jas have been crying for so long for the whl afternoon.We snap the las chances of snaping photos together ...

To be really strong is wasnt easy at all.I try to hold my tears frm droping down frm the corner of my eyes.At 1st i tok i could,seeing a fren that i have noe for 11 years got to leav here.I fee; happy n proud that she could go UK to further her study...I jus try to be strong as hard as i could,even if i really feel like crying i hope is i wil jus cry in my heart...But at the very las moment i jus couldnt hide my tears frm coming down.I jus dono how words can express how much i miss her here for i have use to spent my times with her in most of the days,moment n time,problems,happiness,sadness,discouragement & hearts desire with her !Shld i be the first to feel of her leaving as all ppl around say i wil jus gonna mis u the most over here.Izzit true?

LizArd?I hatE it

Today was free for me,im jus asthough taking tis day as a holiday 4me.Trying to really keep myself free n relax jus aft Accounts paper on yest morning.The paper 1 yest really squeeze 7 of d accounts students...Is really such a hard question til all of us only did bout 2/4 questions.When i jus aft my paper at bout 11.30am saw mum's car outside,she came and pick me hm,waoh is like i nvr think tat is really my mum,she came to bring me hm so tat i could rest aft one day's midnite oil.So mum signed and told my form teacher that she's gonna bring me and Jas home too.Such a great that we could leave earlier ahead to home then to wait til 1.20pm..Thanks mum~

Later at nite as Reb wasnt in mlc so I,Jas,Jac and Keith went dinner together at malim.Toking and chatting together as wat we used to do.Went mp to shop while waiting for dad.After his work sent dad home and noeing mum wasnt around,she went up to Durian Tunggal with another 3aunty to stay ther.And so we went for pool.I think in tis 2weeks i have been playing it so often til almost every 2day we went ther once.Bsides my best buddies,we went ther with Kiat too.Girls remember tis man nvr play pool with guys bcoz they play so well compare to us.And he jus finis 1game in not more than 8 minutes time but of course if it's without us ther.Rebecca was d partner of World,and we 2another team.But however we trully had a great time together ther..It oways make me remember wat Little Joshua oways say :Haiya win or lose it stil a game!" isnt it something to hear frm a children's mouth...He's so cute and smart.

At 1st i really feel like wanting to eat popiah but everywher the popiah store is oways close.Abit kind of disspoited at the same time Sad....Wanting to eat but didnt get to eat so!So kuai kuai went home and learning to cook Campbell mushroom soup...I hardly cook unless for some special purpose...So look at the instructions and do so.At last the soup was ok,not bad ~ so i feel like adding some extra food to make my soup looks better so wat i do is I put some butter on the bread and roaster it.Roaster?I think it should be the right word to use,hope so!So set the time for 3.33minutes.When the time left bout 1minutes more i when to c how nice wil bread wil looks like,how garing it wil be.Guess wat i saw?I saw a lizard jumping for help in d roaster,jump and jump til i get die on my bread at last.I shouted eventually,and is loud if u know i can really shout.Every1 got a shock out of my screaming,but i jus cant take it.I mean it's so irritating to c a lizard is lying on my bread...Wat's tis?Sue ping was laughing loud out of such a funny incident and she told me congrat and eating lizard wil make u much cleverer and good for ur health.No way man,where does the lizard suppose to live,i tok is on the wall or sumthg then to hiding or stay in mine roaster.Trully im very scare of lizard compare to cockroach.A funny insects with a long tail behind it.I wont touch and wil never hold or step on it bcoz tis is jus how irritating it's.And i dont even dare to touch it,dad took it out and do the rest of the work.And i told parents that it's ur work...Anyway jus wanna say thx dad!

Gotta slep abit early coz wil hv to go up to kl tmr v mum.Besides must catch sum time to c my twins and my daddy too.

***Everyone***

After goin through so many things in life,
up and downs,storms and obstacles,
Easily it had make me falls.
To say,it is much more easier than doing it with action.
To stand from falling,it take times and courage.
To be strong,it needs faith and trust.
To be able to do so,it wasnt easy at all.

I learn to say goodbye although it wasnt easy,
althought it really hurts,
but i know i cant longer stay like tis anymore,
I'm awake today and i realise
No matter what Life still have to go on..

Reason for staying had bcome my reason for leaving!
When im not able to fight on,
And when there's nothing for me to fight for,
nothing that could make me stay,
When i knew the what are the answer would be,
I know there's no need for me to try anymore...
What's the point of doing all this when i know things
would never get back into place,
Because u will never know!

As now i see there's so many reason for me to walk away,
Many one asked me :"what's the point of standing still?
At this moment i think and thinked,
And now i know...
I have already give what i can,do wat i m able to do,
whatever thgs that i can do i had did,
Either u can see or u may not,
Someday u may know.
I didnt ask anything from you in return,
Because I remember the written Word of God say
Love is a gift whereby u give it away but do not ask in return.
Besides love,everythg is stil too the same!

I have lost my strength to hold on,
I have lost my faith for doing this anymore longer,
Dream is still a dream,
Someday soon now or later we have to wake up from our dream,
I'm feeling so tired,so tired for all this.
How am i goin to go through tis moment of pain?
The only way and answer i can find is by my own.
What's the point of depending otherelse or promises?
And now i know,
And now i realised,
It's the time for me to say goodbye!

LovE,PhOebe*